I was listening to the radio about a woman who lost her child and the year following her daughter’s passage, the mother became involved in everything, as a way to fill the void and to give meaning back to her life. Her daughter had a disability and this mother had spent 17 very full years advocating for her daughter, being her champion, and ensuring she was cared for. And then she realized she needed to find a purpose in her life.
I considered this story and how it applies to all of us in different ways at different times in our lives. Most of the time we manage on a daily basis. Our lives become routine. Our habits become ingrained. For some, there is a major life experience that jettisons us out of our complacency into a new reality. I consider those the lucky ones. Without that kickstart, we often never reach a new awareness.
Instead we fill the void with TV, food, alcohol, recreational drugs, prescriptions. You name it. We are clever at disguising the emptiness and calling it entertainment rather than confronting our essence.
Posing the question, “What is your purpose?” can be intimidating to answer. We somehow expect we have to strive for some unreachable bar. There is no standard, one HAS to achieve other than what one knows to be true. My bar, my purpose, my essence is mine. I’m not asking anyone else to reach it. It’s all about listening to your heart, finding what is speaking to you, and responding with an action that resonates.
Sometimes we make bold statements and pronouncements in our eagerness to lose weight, or find a partner, or get a new job. And when we tire of the climb (perhaps because we were stating the obvious rather than what was at the core of our yearning), we suddenly become mute, pack up the running shoes, and skulk to the back of the pack.
Well life doesn’t have to be a marathon. In fact, life is a heck of a lot more pleasant if we allow in what we need and want, when we need and want it, but being clear from the outset what that need and want really are. And is it a need or a want? Entirely different sides of the coin.
I want to travel. But I need to find the adventure in every day. Someone else may want a partner in their life, but they need to find comfort and love in their own company first. Another may want to lose weight, but they need to feel satiated with him or her self first. One other person may want to run a marathon, but first needs to appreciate the accomplishment of walking to work on a daily basis. And for someone who wants a new job, they need to find newness if what they do at work on a daily basis first.
I’ve learned to be careful what I ask for. Wanting has led to disappointment. And it hasn’t been until I have been clear on my need, have been able to articulate what my heart is saying/requesting/desiring, that I have been able to find the true path for me. But first, I have had to let go of wanting and instead, start to appreciate the moment.
So what has all this to do with eating a live plant-based diet? It has to do with acceptance and starting from the place you are at first. It has to do with balance and not trying to replace what is with what could be, but rather, noticing what is and sitting with it first. It has to do with understanding what you believe in, what you are passionate about, and what values drive you. And then, you can be open to possibilities, opportunities, and alternative considerations. It has to do with knowing who you are and what is important for you.
No recipe this week. Here is some information about coconut oil.
David Wolfe suggests there are 3 rooms in your home where you should use coconut oil – the kitchen, the bathroom, and the bedroom. I use coconut oil on my body and face daily. And if my hair is a tad on the dry side, I rub the oil on my hands through my hair while it’s wet, before I dry it. I mostly use coconut oil when I make some desserts or in my green curry recipe. I’ll leave the suggestion of in the bedroom to your imagination.